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One gram of practice is worth more than 1000 of theory... Here are the notes for basic introduction workshop what i'm teaching. I hope they would be helpful. Anyway best is to attend the workshop with many exercises between and possibility of asking questions.Workshops/lectures/meetings are: every Mondays at 20.00 at Valreep Polderweg 120 Amsterdam,by appointment at my home or whatever else i would be invited.
1.What is tantra ?
Tantra is one of the oldest sciences in the world, there is a multitude of ways that it can be defined. Its probable that there are more ways to define tantra than there are people that are united through it. It is an ambitious task to try to explain or define Tantra. One must experience tantra with the freedom to define its meaning through one's own experience. In my opinion, tantra connects our sexuality with our spirituality, our body with our soul, our heart with our mind, it balances our feminine and masculine energy, one utilises the sacred act of making love.To make love for a higher purpose, not only to fulfill one's desire but used in a conscious way to raise one's awareness. When we raise our awareness, we strengthen all acts performed in daily life. Raising our consciousness to a greater level improves our relationship with things of importance and to the sustenance of humanity and planet. Making our love sacred, more pleasurable and more fulfilling. Tantric love transforms the sexual act from a short act that ends with an explosion, feelings of dissatisfaction and the loss of the precious life giving ojas/energy, into an implosion of a long ecstatic and deeply spiritual experience that feeds us energy. Tantra sublimates intimacy from the bedroom to our daily life. It transforms the love that we feel within, to the love we give our lover, family â¦ and the whole universe. Tantra is everything and much much more than I will teach you today.
2. Love is the greatest power of all.
Love is the greatest power of all and love has the power to overcome many problems that people face in the 21st Century, so its important to learn to love in every concievable way and the science of Tantra is available to all. Love is the most important experience in life for all of us. Unfortunately there lacks knowledge about the steps that one can take to amplify the love experience. The painful paradox is that while there are many other disciplines that one may learn while at school, this type of knowledge does not have a place in the coventional education system. One is rather fortunate if they have experienced unconditional love from their parents. To fill this gap we wrote these words, we shall read them, and I'm giving this workshop.
3. Loss of semen means loosing energy
One of the basic things that we have to learn is to avoid ejaculation, during ejaculation a man loses essential energy and the only thing that he is capable of doing after this great loss is sinking into a state of deep sleep. If one loses so much essential energy there is a possibility of suffering numerous health problems, quick frustration, quick temper and a lack of energy just to name a few. Less than 10 minutes foreplay and less than 7-minute vaginal penetration will leave a woman extremely disappointed. A woman needs a greater time in length for foreplay to arouse her excitement enabling her to feel total relaxation and reach orgasm. When a man thinks only of his own desires it will surely discourage the woman from making love and may make her feel used, leading to frustration in the relationship.
Therefore, before we learn to slow down or even halt ejaculation, one should realise the importance of foreplay, it is the most important part of lovemaking, increasing the time of making love is what will give a women greater satisfaction. So let your lover be the guide when vaginal penetration should start. During foreplay the revelation that one's whole body, with a mutual exchange of energy is able to experience ecstasy. Foreplay is a great time to get to know your own erogenous map. Mouth, breast, genitals are the common places of sexual pleasure, but we are all individuals, in each one of us are hidden great mysteries what we have to explore.
5 Intimacy not just in bed
Intimacy and love should not be confined to the bedroom, making love is not only vaginal penetration but can be expressed through kind words, hugging, the exchange of looks shared with one's partner during every shared moment together. A very nice habit to learn is to cuddle every time you see each other. A second one: before falling asleep, cuddle each other in the spoon position, breathing together, synchronizing your energies. Giving and receiving love by doing things together such as dancing, practising partner yoga, Qi gong, cooking dinner together, reading to each other, taking a course together, activism etc. Yoga, Tao chi and Qi gong are complimentary for tantric practise because they educate one about the flow of energy. This ecstatic energy should spread into all areas of our lives.
6.Male and female energy
Very often our sexual life may improve if the woman took a proactive role during lovemaking. They are more than capable to lead lovemaking and it may make her more content. ...and what man does not want to satisfy his beloved ? UnfortunatelyÂ not everyone is able to reverse the role. For centuries the female sex is suppressed by the male sex. Patriarchy is a contributing factor of creating wars, climate change, hunger and many problems in the world. In a matriarchal society destruction does not happen but rather restoration to the natural order of things.Of course I'm generalising a bit here, we all have feminine and masculine energies, Yin and Yang, moon end sun etc. A balance of the two polarities is a deciding factor for our happiness. Unfortunately in the educational setting, dogma encourages men to exaggerate their masculinity and women to exaggerate their femininity, this idea is of course lopsided. Both polarities must be embraced and understood if we are to be whole again.Tantra is a positive step in the struggle for both men and women's liberation, liberation can only lead towards a better society. Therefore, we must destroy certain stereotypes that have been imposed upon us and allow the man to be emotional and sensitive being, allow his feelings to be expressed rather than suppressed, and allow the woman to be in touch with her masculinity. Let us be ourselves. Let's do it for ourselves.
Loving ourselves is the foundation of real love, when we love ourselves we can truly love others. When we feel good about our self we will have the self esteem needed to act in love towards another being. To truly love ourselves may increase the chance of amplifying the love shared with our partners, family, animals, nature, whole planet and the universe. From birth, everyone expects something from us, whether it is to become someone of status or to achieve something of great material wealth. Girls are expected to be pretty and never grow old, they are also expected to be exemplary mothers and wives. At the same time boys and later men are judged less by their looks but what they own and how high they rank in society, the pressure is so high that most people will constantly feel undervalued. Thousands of billboards and advertisements use psychology subtley telling women how they should look, "Never fulfilled and unnatural ideals ". The majority of women feel insecure, as a result some become anorexic and some resort to cosmetic surgery. Everyone is beautiful in their own unique way.
Question to woman: What are the reasons you want to experience love, is it for your external beauty which will one day fade away or do you want someone to love you for who you are in the deep recesses of your heart? Question to man: What are the reasons you want to experience love. Is it for the car you drive or the numerous material things that you have collected, that will one day become obselete. Or is it the position in society you have or do you want someone to love you for who you are in the deep recesses of your heart?
Exercises that one can do to build self love
To achieve this, stand in the mirror every morning (or as often as you can) and enjoy your unique beauty, stroke and caress every part of Yourselves. Watch and love every corner and part of Your body. Be thankful for their functions.
The fact that masturbation is immoral or not ethical is another myth that should be overthrown on the way to our liberation.
Self pleasuring ritual is not a sin (like making love as well :) If you do not end up with losing the semen it is very good exercise not only for singles.You can learn how to work with energies, breath, self acceptance without interrupting by strong energy of Your beloved. Especialy for men masturbation is good way to learn how to hold back ejaculation.
It is important to know the sexual anatomy of our body, there is more than one orgasmic point other than clitoris in the woman's body, so there more types of orgasm to explore, to mix and to play with.
G point is the most known. Its in front of vagina more less 7 cm depth - depends from the woman. [ In mans the G point is achievable mainly through entering the anus or slightly by massaging the perineum between testicles and anus.] From it depth depend the position in which could be stimulated in the best way. In touch feels like a button,sponch or a walnut. In this point very often are stored a lot of painful memories that very often are released during the orgasm. That's why when a person is experiencing it one of the first times, suddenly may get angry, scared, sad and she/he may begin to shout, cry etc. Don't be discouraged by this. It is revealing healing process.
U point â just below the urinary hole, about 3 cm below the clitoris. Stimulated together with point G could give so much pleasure that can lead a woman to ejaculate.
M Point â from the sound of mmmmm... the woman would make this sound when is stimulated. At the bottom of vagina and sensitive mainly after at least one of orgasm.
There are numerous sensitive points, areas like the lips, anus, perineum, breast, head, ears etc. They are varying in each woman (man) Some of them have to be stimulated more often or together or after stimulating other areas. By mixing stimulation of all of them we can invent our own way of ecstasy. ... Everyone is different so explore yourself, explore with your lover. Make good use foreplay and afterplay
Learn how to use them during love making and how to be focus on them.
If we welcome and learn other methods in our lives it may help us expand the ecstasy of our love and elevate it to greater levels, thus in the end receive more power to experience greater love. One of the main thigs to master is control, by raising awareness one knows when they are close to the so-called point of no return - that means, the moment you feel that you are about to ejaculate use the technique of clenching the PC muscles. Basic method is clenching the PC muscle, deep breathing, energy transfer up and down through whole body or/and pressing specific points.
PC muscles, (sometimes called "muscles of love" or "muscles of sex" ) are the muscles which prevents the flow of urine. By tightening these muscles we narrow the possibility of sperm ejaculation and also we send the sexual energy up. They make circulation better in the pelvic area and give you the possibility of achieving multiple orgasms as and when you would like them to happen. When a woman uses this technique it it is very pleasurable for her and partner during love making.
More about at special page further
For the energy flow it is very helpful to breathe deeply, in general the deeper you breathe the healthier you will become, the calmer you will be and feeling of being more alive. With every internal breath we take we receive oxygen - the energy of life. With each exhalation we take we expel toxins from our system. The deeper we breath, the more energy we receive, the deeper we exhale- the more we purify our bodies. When we observe our breathing during sex, we will notice that it becomes shallow and fast the closer we are to orgasm. Through deep breathing we can calm our fear, pain and anger. In the same way we can slow down and avoid ejaculation.
13. Synchronising and moving energy up and down
In addition, breathing,Â synchronising this with the tightening of the PC muscle's is very helpful to increase the energy flow. Before we learn to feel energy we have to imagine it, if we synchronise all of these methods with our partners we are sure to raise our awareness. Another technique which is recommended to learn is to place the tongue on the roof of your mouth, just behind our teeth. This will help improve the energy flow, it also helps when one has a feeling that they are close to the point of no return.
Transferring the energy to the sick parts of your body may help speed up the healing process. There is probably no better effective and more pleasurable medicine than that of love. As someone once said, "Sex can be a way to hell or a way to heaven" - you choose. In the same way sex can give you energy, health and youth when it is filled with love and when you learn to use this energy. On the other hand, by the frequent loss of semen we deprive ourselves of energy, we weaken our body, and we even speed up the processes of disease and ageing. As tantra is focused on spirituality and ecstasy, sexual tao is more focused on health.
15. Open communication
Very important in this regard is to be open, to not be afraid to communicate how one wants/needs to be touched, kissed and loved. If it will be easy for us to describe our expectations we will avoid misunderstandings, hurts therefore gain greater satisfaction, respect and understanding. Sexual fantasies and expectations are different and if both sides agree, no taboos, no religion, social pressures, etc. should interfere in it. Through expression we are encouraging our partners to do the same, most people feel happier when their beloved is open and communicative.
When making love not only are we naked - our soul lays bare, in that moment of intimacy it is very easy to be hurt by an unpleasant remark. Once one is hurt with severe criticism, one tends to emotionally shut down and remain afraid to re-open. Constructive criticism is the key here so that our beloved won't be wounded. Example, note the difference between: "Why we're always hurrying I'm not ready yet" from: "Your touch is so pleasant here, could You continue a little bit longer?"
Treat Your woman as goddess and Your man as god
The world would be a happier and more positive nurturing place if we could learn to love our neighbours seeing the divine in all people - especially in our loved ones. Treat them like godesses, gods, not only in our bed but during daily life. Deep breath, scream, laugh, and touch can help the energy flow, and at the same time could be a very exciting expression of our happiness, ecstasy, etc.. There is nothing wrong with love but only the absence of love is wrong. So do not be ashamed shouting while you make love, don't be afraid that your neighbours will hear you.
16. Present Moment
It is very important that we learn with all of our mind to be in the present moment. Love is incredibly beautiful, more so when we are disciplined and commit to it. Try not to waste beautiful moments thinking about something else. It is important that our mind is as clear as possible, the cleaner is our own conscience, the more we give love the more we areÂ able to experience love. Our so-called 'Sins' (those against our own principles of ethics), affect us at a greater degree, especially if they relate to our beloved. We will not be able to look honestly and deeply into eyes of our beloved if we have betrayed him\her. Our love may never be able to spread its wings completely, so it is encouraged to live in truth and honesty. And here we are closing the circle that a happy life you may receive by living life in truth.
This workshop is only an introduction to the basic knowledge and the practise of love. I hope that this workshop encourages you to read more about tantra, sexual tao. I'm inviting you to follow our next workshops that are more practice based rather than theory. As with each discipline, the art of love needs patience, practice time and devotion. Don't get disappointed when it doesn't always work or takes time. Realise the painful emotions that can be released on the way of tantric love. Relax, You are heading in a positive direction and leaving behind those who are afraid to make mistakes...
It is worth putting your time and energy into it, love in all honesty is the most important experience for many of us. However, even small hints like "to first blow, then tickle, then lightly kiss, and then touch and lick at the end" can be very revealing, it is certain that perfecting these simple techniques our beloved will reciprocate. Its good to vary every love making session, don't allow repetition to happen too often. Therefore, use your imagination which in itself may prove to be a treasure of ideas, if only we learn and dare to use it.
Good luck and lot of pleasure, energy and love!
For more update check: http://affordabletantra.blogspot.nl
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